December 09, 2011

I want it all

It's my birthday today,I woke up feeling aches n pains, must've been the result of a combination of super abs pilates workout yesterday and way too soft pillows that provided zero support. But yes, the aches remind me that I am very much alive, alive in this earthly body.   On this day as I am lost in my thoughts in a corner of the resort pool (I think better in water, must be the diver in me?) I realize I have lots to be grateful for:
For good friends
For family
For being born in the increasingly crowded and congested sg
For having the luxury of working for my next holiday
For being able to turn a head or two once in a while (and yes it's been a very long while)

The question that begs a good answer though, is, what can I do that is more fulfilling and meaningful? There are few things I am interested in, work with dogs? Work as a pseudo dive travel agent n get myself free trips to explore exotic locales? Be a wildly successful author? ;)   Ahhhh it all sounds so good but also so idealistic in my-oh-so-logical-mind. My life is now on a low volatility track, very stable,very serene,very oh-how-do-I-put-it? Boring? Non exciting? Feel like something is lacking? It's all very catch-22. I want it more entertaining but I don't want to give up the stability. I want it to be more rewarding. I want it all and then some.

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